Missing my bump

I'm overjoyed to finally have my new baby girl but there is a part of me that misses my baby bump. I miss feeling all of those little wriggles inside me, seeing those little movements. I miss the feeling of new life inside me, the joy and the privilege of being able to carry a child. I miss catching a sideways glimpse in the mirror and the feeling of admiration and amazement at how my body could expand. I miss the feeling of being so constantly and completely connected with my baby. Pregnancy is such an amazing and special time. 

Good news

I’ve been getting anxious over the last few days as two of my lovely independent midwife friends are currently providing my midwifery care and it was looking like they wouldn’t be able to provide intrapartum care after 25 October due to the EU directive requiring them to have professional indemnity insurance (currently unavailable). Thankfully the Nursing and Midwifery Council have confirmed that independent midwives can continue practising as normal until early next year and so I can now relax knowing my friends will still be able to be my midwives even if Pod wants to wait another couple of weeks!

No place like home

As my due date gets closer, I find that I don’t want to travel too far away from home. We were invited to an afternoon tea and quiz that friends of ours are involved in organising but it is over an hour’s drive away from home. It’s not very far really, and whilst it would be lovely to see that group of friends, I just feel more comfortable staying within a few miles of home ‘just in case’. I do miss going to visit my family (again, an hour’s drive away) but at the moment, there’s no place like home!

Gender guesses

We decided not to find out Pod’s gender at the 20 week scan and so we have been getting lots of guesses from our friends and family as to whether we are expecting a boy or a girl. Earlier on in my pregnancy, the balance was tipped slightly in favour of a girl but now there has been a definite swing in favour of a boy. Whether this is due to the shape of my bump, or the fact we already have a girl or just gut feeling from people, who knows. We’re looking forward to finding out very soon!

More nesting

Thankfully last night was a much better night sleep-wise and I have more energy today.   Which is great, as the nesting instinct has kicked right back in and I have ended up cleaning the entire house from top to bottom as well as getting all the ironing done.  That aside, there are no other indications that Pod is ready to arrive just yet – hopefully he or she will hold off for a couple of days as Michael is working away on an event at the moment and is a couple of hours’ drive away (which makes me a little anxious!)

The 'Anxious Awaiters'

They've started. The phone calls to 'see how I am', 'any twinges yet?' Despite my due date not being until the end of the month, it seems people are anxiously awaiting some signs that Pod's arrival is imminent. So far they've been disappointed. As far as I can tell Pod appears to be very comfy still and in no hurry to be evicted from the big mamma house. Which is fine. Pod will come when he or she is ready. And in the meantime I will make the most of being able to have one to one time with Jessica.

Insomnia

I've been suffering from insomnia quite a lot over the last few days. Most nights I seem to wake in the early hours and then be unable to get back to sleep for at least a couple of hours. It's not that I struggle too much to get comfortable or even Pod bouncing on my bladder that is keeping me awake - just that I can't seem to turn off my busy brain and go back to sleep and even my hypnotherapy CD doesn't really help. I guess it is nature's way of preparing me for going back to disturbed nights.

A brief moment of panic

I'm now at the stage of pregnancy where dropping the laundry basket on my big toe whilst sorting out the washing upstairs and yelping resulted in my hubby running upstairs in rather a hurry to 'see if I was alright'. I think he was worried that I'd gone into labour all of a sudden and was quite relieved when I reassured him that everything was fine. didn't notice the popping but loved listening to you sing with me - lovely voice, thanks for joining :-) despite the fact that dropping the laundry basket on it hurt quite a bit, my toe is absolutely fine and is barely even bruised. And I definitely haven't gone into labour just yet!

Here we are in October already!

I can’t believe we are in October already and all being well, Pod should be making his or her appearance at some point later this month. The birthing pool arrived this morning so it is all starting to feel much more imminent now! I’ve enjoyed this pregnancy and whilst I am looking forward to meeting Pod, I am still quite happy to wait until Pod is ready rather than being impatient for his or her arrival. It is lovely to feel all those little movements and I think I will probably miss them for a few days after Pod arrives.

Keeping going

I was feeling quite tired and lazy this morning and felt quite tempted to bail out of going to Stay and Play. Two things made me get up and make the effort though. Firstly (and most importantly) it is good for Jessica to get out of the house and have the space to run around and the chance to play with other children. And secondly because I have now reached the stage where missing any of my regular groups potentially means that people might start getting unnecessarily excited and think that Pod has made a bit of an early appearance.

Appointment angst

Wasn’t too impressed at waiting at the doctors’ surgery this afternoon for my antenatal check-up only to be told that the midwife hadn’t turned up for her clinic so all the appointments had to be rearranged and as the next clinic at the surgery was full, I was told to call the community midwives office to arrange an appointment at the hospital who told me they couldn’t fit me in until 8th October at the earliest!  Fortunately the GP surgery have managed to squeeze me in for a check next week so I can at least get my bloods done.

Ticking off the to-do's

I’m gradually working my way through the to-do list of all the things I’d like to finish doing before Pod makes his or her appearance – scrapbooking the cards from when Jessica was born, getting various things ready for Pod’s arrival (mostly done although still a couple of things that need doing) – whilst making the most of still being able to give Jessica my full attention. I’ve had a bit of a burst of energy over the last few days which has helped and the nesting instinct is definitely kicking in. I’m starting to feel ready now – not long to go!

Preparing for Pod

Had an appointment this afternoon with one of my lovely independent midwives (who I worked with very closely when I was still practising). She brought my birth bag with her and we discussed my preferences for birth. It made me realise just how close I am now getting to the time when Pod is likely to make his or her arrival. I have been washing Jessica’s newborn nappies so they are all ready for when Pod arrives. They are so unbelievably tiny – I find it hard to believe that Jessica ever fitted into them. Her nappies look huge in comparison.

Nesting

I think nesting has started to kick in. Yesterday I spent most of Jessica’s nap time sorting out boxes in the study (which really is a storage room more than anything else!) and today I have been cleaning out the kitchen cupboards. I’ve definitely started feeling a bit more energetic over the last few days as well which is a good thing although does also mean that I have a tendency to overdo things and then spend the evening feeling quite achy. I still have a few more weeks before Pod is ‘due’ – hopefully this burst of energy will last!

Easing the numbness

I’ve given up waiting for a referral about the carpal tunnel and have bought wrist splints from the pharmacy as it has been getting worse and I’ve been getting increasingly frustrated with struggling to write, or open jars or anything like that. My lovely chiropractor has worked on my wrist joints to try and ease it which has helped a little bit and since using the wrist splints at night, there has been a definite improvement. I still wake with numb, tingly fingers and experience numbness throughout most of the day but it’s not quite as bad as it was.

Being sized up

In the last week, I’ve had several people tell me that I have a ‘nice, neat bump’ and a couple of them only recently realised I was pregnant. It makes a refreshing change from most of the other comments I seem to get which usually imply that I’m huge for this stage of pregnancy and I’m growing a massive baby. One of those came just minutes after a ‘nice, neat bump’ comment and during the same mother-toddler group. Which just goes to show how subjective it all is. It’s a good job I don’t get hung up about these things.

Complaining about carpal tunnel

Trying to write the thank you cards for Jessica’s birthday presents and having carpal tunnel syndrome is not a good combination.  I can manage to write a couple of cards before my fingers go really numb and then I have to stop for a while which is quite frustrating and means that progress on this has been a lot slower than I thought it would be.  The numbness and pins and needles is definitely getting worse – just waiting for a referral at the moment and then hopefully I can get some wrist splints to wear which will help ease this.

Needing to slow down a little

Lovely to have a day catching up with a friend and her 11 month old daughter.  Jessica enjoyed having a friend and we all enjoyed a wander round the shops - getting my friend's daughter measured for shoes for the first time and Jessica getting a new pair as her feet have grown. The only downside was that I overdid things and was quite achy and tired by the time I got home. Must try and take things a bit easier - having been lucky enough to get to this stage of pregnancy with minimal discomfort, sometimes I forget I'm not Superwoman!

Comparisons

Physically this pregnancy has been quite similar to last time - both Pod and Jessica are/were little wrigglebottoms and on the whole I have enjoyed being pregnant. However, this time I am definitely getting more heartburn than last time (I don't think I needed Gaviscon even once last time) and carpal tunnel syndrome has also started in the last couple of weeks so I frequently get pins and needles and numbness in my fingers which is not very pleasant at times. On the plus side though, so far the SPD has not really caused any discomfort so that is good.

Preparing for Pod

I’ve started preparing a little more for Pod’s arrival. The Moses basket has been brought down from the loft as have Jessica’s newborn baby clothes (the unisex ones anyway) which have now been washed and are hanging on the line to dry. I can’t believe how tiny they are, how tiny Jessica once was and that she will be two in just a week’s time. Where has that time gone? What a blessing it has been to watch her grow from that tiny baby in intensive care to a happy toddler who seems so healthy and brings so much joy.